As a Buddhist, I sometimes catch a sideways glance for drinking a beer or eating a hot dog wrapped in bacon.
But no one ever questions me reading Dogen's Zuimonki. Or heading up to John Jeavon's Ecology Action to talk about eating our own poop. Or that I have picked up a book at all, like ANYTHING by Derrick Jensen.
In the last three weeks, I've seen Derrick Jensen and John Jeavons Speak. Do you know what I learned? I was "drinking" again. I wasn't just listening to what they had to say, but I wanted the answers, I wanted stable ground to stand on so I could figure out how to save all beings.
When I think of our vow to save all beings, a trench is deepened across my heart. If only these beings would get out of my god damn way, I could save them. If only they'd let me mow down their mono-cropped fields and allowed me to plant their 30 high caloric, 60 bio mass, 10 nutrient rich percent of organic crops, we could start saving their soil. If they'd just let me call their boss and tell them they quit because they have Zazen to sit and a front lawn to peel up and plant. You can e-mail the required phone numbers.
If we could just give money up and start investing in cultivation of body and mind, of the land base, we could move toward being "saved." It's really simple: We are deluded and we are salting our fields.
And then I know this koan and I know that being saved is more than a rearranging of this consciously constructed reality. But I think this rearranging would at least provide a little more time to "get it."
Being a Buddhist, I want exactly what DJ and JJ want and more- after saving the land base and ALL beings (JJ seems to only care about humans), then I want to talk about mind-only and emptiness. That we did all of this together, and guess what, it's not even actually there like we think it is, and we're still suffering.
This is a rare moment for me, where everything relaxes, and I stop clutching the sutra or the shovel or the pen.
I give this another 5 hours.