So, Jiryu's teaching on finding the practice in our life really struck a chord in me. Maybe because it started something like, "I know a lot of lay practitioners who trudge through life pining away for some other life, maybe another life at Green Gulch, where the practice will be better."
That's horribly elaborated and not really a quote as much as what I took away from his talk. But if your interested, it is on the SFZC website.
And then the next day I asked my teacher (I forgot, I actually have a Zen teacher who speaks living words every Sunday, even if they're not the words I want to hear, like "No, I will not ordain you") how we get a handle on our struggle to practice. That coming to the Zen temple once a week is hard enough and going every day was hard, and living there for 9 months was hard and...that's all he needed to hear.
He said "Just make sure you sit. It's best to sit with us, but if not with us, make sure it's the first thing you do, it's your greatest responsibility."
And that's horribly paraphrased, too. But it's what I heard.
I forgot that it's my responsibility to sit. That's I'm not wedging into full lotus so I keep my hips open, but that by sitting, I'm doing something for the world. I'm fulfilling my precepts and my vows.
And so I went yesterday for our regular Sunday extended Zazen/Mundo/Kusen and I went this morning for what I could- the first half hour.
I also went to yoga for the last five days.
This Flying Pig is flapping around, gettin' some air.